Kindred Spirits

For years while working at Thermo-Fisher Scientific I would frequent the local Starbucks to spend time in the Word during lunch.  It wasn’t as if I was trying to flaunt my faith, but I had learned from past experience that my time spent in the Word seemed to be more blessed when I was in a public place.  Often during these times I would feel the presence of God so strongly that it would leave me in a deeply relaxed trance like state – and I must admit that it felt so good that I literally became addicted to God’s Word.  On one such occasion during lunch one of my female coworkers happened to pass by and laughed, “Oh – here with your girlfriend again?”  I knew that my love for God would be a serious barrier to my relationship prospects, and I became somewhat of an anomaly to my mostly unbelieving coworkers.

It was during these years that I began to wrestle with the question of relationships – I had always believed in the concept of being ‘equally yoked’ with other believers, but in a land of no opportunity it was easy to begin reevaluating my position.  Wasn’t it possible to genuinely love someone who was not a Christian?  One of my coworkers had challenged me with this very question, and my answer was that love is never self serving and always looks to the interests of others.  Although a Christian may ‘love’ someone that is not a believer, it would not be in the best interest of either person to pursue a relationship.  The action of True Love therefore in that circumstance would be to avoid a relationship altogether.  My response however was purely theoretical, and I didn’t really understand why it was not in the best interest of either person to be involved in such a relationship.

After all, didn’t God send Jesus to die for an unbelieving world so that we could be in a relationship with Him?  Jesus was Love incarnate, but the world’s response to that love was to kill him.  In order to really understand why a Christian should not be in a relationship with an unbeliever, I needed to understand that True Love can never be reciprocated by the world.  Not only can that love not be reciprocated, but Jesus warned His disciples, “Marvel not, my brethren, if the world hate you.” -1 John 3:13  Why should the world have hated Jesus?  Jesus was not condemning or self righteous, and only lived to give His entire life on earth.  The life of Jesus was the perfect model for what love should truly be – and yet the prophet Isaiah spoke of Him, “He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.” –Isaiah 53:3

The reason the world hated Jesus is because of the problem of condemnation.  Jesus never condemned anyone, but he was also Light by his very nature – and Light has a way of revealing sin.  When people were around Jesus, they felt the weight and condemnation of their own sin in their lives – and naturally lashed out at Jesus in an attempt to justify themselves.  When we have unrepentant sin in our lives, darkness serves as a cloak that allows us to feel good about ourselves, and we gravitate towards it because we feel comfortable there.  However when the light shines into that darkness we are left feeling naked and exposed and our natural response is to curse the light for doing that to us.  Jesus spoke of this to his disciples saying, “And this is the condemnation, that light is come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil.” –John 3:19

It is possible to love an unbeliever or even a Christian with unrepentant sin their lives - and we should! But in order to have the kind of fellowship and intimacy that God intended us to have in relationships - you must be with someone who is also walking in the Light.  1 John 1:7 says, “If we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanses us from all sin.”

The Cyclone

The whole city was on alert, and people yelled as they ran past me, “Get out of here!  There is a tornado coming!!”  Immediately a deep and penetrating fear struck my soul and left me paralyzed as I watched the last people evacuate a gray and colorless city.  For a moment I just stood there and stared at the bleak and empty buildings that surrounded me.  Something about the situation seemed distorted and unnatural, and the sense of fear I had exceeded the gravity of my situation.  Then from the core of my being a sense of anger began to well up, and I spoke to the air of the empty street I stood in, “NO… I am NOT afraid of death.”  At that moment I turned to look deep into the heart of the city where I saw a whirling cyclone descend from a sheet of dark clouds above.

The cyclone looked like a giant pillar whirling with clouds from the sky, and its cylindrical shape from top to bottom seemed decidedly unnatural.  While I pondered about the unusual nature of the cloud formation, several beams of light shot from the sky around the sides of the pillar to the ground – confirming my suspicion that it was in fact unnatural.  Even though the cyclone was miles away from me I had the distinct sense that it was ‘watching’ me from afar.  Again my spirit rose in anger as I squared my shoulders against the adversary of my soul, and I identified him saying, ‘SATAN’.  The cyclone then responded by moving towards me at a rapid pace.  Standing my ground I watched as the pillar approached me, prepared if necessary to meet my death.  The cyclone enveloped my body for a moment – and then disappeared without a trace, leaving me standing alone and at peace.

When I awoke from the dream I had a new understanding of the tactics that SATAN uses to control and manipulate us.  Oftentimes SATAN will package a spirit of fear in legitimate circumstances around us – and like a virus attached to an email we accept it into our lives.  The moment we have accepted that spirit of fear, we can be controlled into doing his will without even realizing it.  It is important for us to realize that even though God has called us to use wisdom and common sense in interpreting the events that are going on around us; we must not rely on our own understanding over God.  The moment we bow to the altar of our own understanding over the Holy Spirit is the moment we have given SATAN a foothold into our lives.  Proverbs 3:5 reminds us to “Trust in the LORD with all your heart; and lean not unto your own understanding.”

In my dream it was only through the Holy Spirit that I knew something was awry with my situation, even though my mind had a very different interpretation of the surroundings.  Regardless of what is going on around us, we must NEVER allow ourselves to make decisions out of a spirit of fear.  Sometimes we can confuse a spirit of fear with the leading of the Holy Spirit, because they are both supernatural sources of insight.  One source however is demonic, and to distinguish between the two it is important to remember that, “God has not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” -2 Timothy 1:7 Before making any decisions in haste, it is always good to take a quiet moment between ourselves and God – and make sure that fear isn’t a motivating factor behind our actions.

When we understand that a spirit of fear really IS trying to motivate us – a decision to resist will almost always be met with a test!  As in my dream, almost all fears that we have are rooted in the fear of death.  If death is the worst possible outcome of any situation, and we are NOT afraid of it – then SATAN really can’t have that strong of an influence on us.  Scripture tells us that JESUS died to free us from the fear of death saying, “Forasmuch then as the children are partakers of flesh and blood, he also himself likewise took part of the same; that through death he might destroy him that that had the power of death, that is, the devil; And deliver them, who through fear of death were all their lifetime subject to bondage.” –Hebrews 2:14-15 Because of what JESUS has done for us, we should no longer fear death!!  Having that confidence produces a great boldness in us, and like the Apostle Paul we can declare over ourselves, “For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.” –Philippians 1:21

In The Gym

I have always hated working out in public places.  There is something about the gym that seems to intensify our self-consciousness and awareness of others, and consequently it has to be one of the most superficial environments.  After one workout I opened the door of a gym to leave as a woman with a purple streak of hair was about to enter.  Few women are able to appreciate the dilemma that this situation places a man in.  The options are to either, A: Walk past the person and risk being perceived as rude, or B: Hold the door open and risk being perceived as a creep.  I decided that option ‘B’ was the best way to proceed because it was better for me to take any damage than her.  As she walked by while I held open the door she wagged her head like a cobra and said, “I know YOUR kind…”

Later on I explained what happened to my sister and she exclaimed, “Well, you really can’t blame her.”  Intrigued and a little bewildered I responded, “What? What do you mean I can’t blame her?”  In the most matter-of-fact tone possible she expressed, “Well, you were at a gym.  And all guys at gyms are ‘douche-bags’.”  This was quite a revelation for me.  I couldn’t believe that all I needed to be awarded the status of ‘douche-bag’ was a ‘Y’ chromosome and physical presence at a gym.  What that meant is if I was friendly there was a good chance I would be considered a douche-bag, AND if I was a jerk there was a good chance I would be considered a douche-bag.  All in all though it was relieving to think that I made the ‘right’ decision in holding open the door – because a friendly douche-bag was probably better than a jerk douche-bag.

Being a Christian in today’s world is really no different than being a guy at a gym.  If we are friendly there is a good chance we will be perceived as deceitful, and if we are unfriendly we will similarly be denounced as evil.  As believers it is important to know this in advance so that we can be patient and understanding when it happens!  Just like women at the gym, people in the world have some very good historical reasons for being wary of ‘Christians’ – and automatically will be on the defensive when they know you are a believer.  But beyond the evils committed in the name of Christianity in the past, most people in reality are angry at God in one way or another.  As Christians we represent God – and that means we will be the physical outlet for others anger!  David wrote about this phenomenon saying, “For the zeal of your house has eaten me up; and the reproaches of them that reproached you have fallen on me.” –Psalm 69:9

When somebody hits you physically or verbally, our natural inclination is to strike back.  But if you realize that the anger being directed at you is really an expression of frustration towards God – you would never want to strike back!  The only way to bring healing to another person’s life is to absorb all their anger – and refuse to reciprocate it back.  Scripture says in Proverbs 16:6 that, “By mercy and truth iniquity is purged..”  It’s only through mercy and truth that a heart can be opened to receive the Love of Jesus into their lives.  It’s painful bearing the anger and hatred that people have towards God, but if that’s what it takes to save them – it’s worth it.  Beyond that, there is something about suffering for Christ that can do an amazing work in our own walk with God.  There is no pain we can suffer that JESUS didn’t suffer greater – and all of us are saved only because He decided to take our wrath for us.

In the days ahead, it is important that we arm ourselves with patience and the love of Jesus in our hearts.  Many hearts are so deeply hardened the only way they will come to Christ is to see for themselves a Love and Peace that passes understanding.  It’s a difficult road to follow – one that requires both humility and as Paul explained to Titus, “In all things showing a pattern of good works.” –Titus 2:7 We are not preaching ourselves to others, but JESUS and His Salvation.  But if they see that we are selfish and manipulative people, they won’t want anything to do with our Jesus.  As long as we are mindful of the mercy and grace that JESUS pours out on us every day, it’s a lot easier to extend that same mercy and grace to others.  Just like a guy at a gym, its consistency of character that will eventually win over hardened hearts.

String Theory

Dad took the three of us kids into the kitchen with a pseudo-serious demeanor that made us wonder what he was up to.  He was playful like that, and by his gestures and body movements it was easy for us to tell that this was some kind of game.  Leaning down as if to communicate some deep and wonderful secret he told us, “Did you know that there are invisible strings that hang from the sky all around the world?”  Our immediate response was something like, “Pffffffff…… Sure Dad, Whatever.”  His eyes then widened with his best look of feigned shock and said, “Oh no, no, it’s true.  In fact, there are strings hanging from the ceiling in this very room.”  The three of us were not going to be gullible over this, and so we defiantly (yet playfully) said, “OK – Prove it then!!”

Picking up a standard number 2 pencil and rubbing it up and down with his thumb and pointer finger my Dad responded, “I will… watch me drag this pencil across the floor with one of the strings.”  He then looked up towards the light in the room, and with great focused concentration moved his head until suddenly ‘spotting’ something.  Reaching out into space he ‘plucked’ what was presumably one of the strings and began to ‘wrap’ it around the pencil, tying it into a knot.  At this point the three of us were thoroughly heckling my Dad and laughing at the whole ridiculous routine.  For a 7, 9 and 11 year old – we were a pretty tough audience.  Dad interrupted our hilarity with “Wait! Watch this…”  Carefully placing the pencil on the floor with the ‘string’ in his right hand, he slowly moved his hand across the floor…. And the pencil followed!!

“What?!! Gimme that pencil!” The three of us instantly began analyzing the pencil for any suspicious additions.  There was nothing…. Just a regular pencil.  “Wait a minute… what’d you do to it!!” we demanded.  Of course we weren’t about to fall for that stupid ‘string’ thing, but Dad had definitely done something to cause the pencil to move across the floor.  Searching for an explanation we immediately began advancing possible theories to explain the phenomena… and then we remembered – Dad was rubbing the pencil!!  “That’s it!”we reasoned, “Some kinda static electricity thing…”  We grabbed the pencil again, rubbing it up and down and saying, “But how…?”  Dad watched us for a while rubbing the pencil viciously and trying to stick it to things, when he could no longer contain himself and burst out laughing.  The joke was clearly on us.

“Hahahahha…” My Dad was turning red with laughter, and we knew that this was our cue to start feeling dumb. “I Blew the pencil across the floor!” His entire routine was elaborately conceived so that we would ignore the most obvious explanation for what had happened.  If we didn’t buy into the whole ‘string’ thing, we would almost surely buy into the pencil rubbing routine.  Our focus was so distracted from our Dad’s face that we failed to notice or even consider that he was blowing the pencil across the floor! We were forced by deceit into considering evidence that was really very far fetched, and completely beyond the knowledge of the average kid to evaluate.  Thankfully, Dad was kind enough to tell us the truth BEFORE we spent a long and fruitless search into the subtleties of static electricity.

It would be really sad if I had spent my whole life remembering that pencil move across the floor and studying to find the answer, only to end up like some of the people the Apostle Paul spoke about, “Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.” -2 Timothy 3:7  Like my Dad in his game, there are plenty of forces in real life that are constantly distracting us from the most important things  to consider.  These demand our intellectual time and investment, and they are so far beyond the scope of the average individual that we are compelled to accept them as true.  Paul warned the church of his time about these things saying, “…avoid profane and vain babblings, and oppositions of science falsely so called: Which some professing have erred concerning the faith.” -1 Timothy 6:20-21  You will find in the end that the faith of JESUS is a much better investment than any opposition of science… when you focus on His face you won’t end up feeling dumb in the end.

Fellowship By The Fire

In relationship terms we were old now – all in our late twenties and early thirties, something we were vaguely conscious of as the sand crunched beneath us on a late night in Santa Cruz.  People often go to the beach to find solace in the ambience of the waves and gentle ocean breezes, but for us it only seemed to emphasize what we didn’t have.  Maybe it had that effect for all the couples walking at the shoreline, but for our group of bachelors it was just a reminder of time marching on without us.  The stars shone brightly in the sky that night, and on the beach for miles around the flickering of distant bonfires could be seen standing out in the darkness.  We weren’t headed in any particular direction, but in the distance we saw an isolated fire burning brightly with no one around it.  For a while we used the fire as a beacon to guide us in the dark, but our curiosity rose when no one came to it.

Arriving at the fire we were shocked to find it blazing with fresh wood underneath as if newly made.  The cool ocean air was starting to penetrate our clothing, so we weren’t about to waste the opportunity in front of us.  The three of us sat around the fire and its warmth soaked in us and chased away the cold.  It was a perfect moment, where the sounds of the beach, the stars in the sky, and the fellowship of brothers all seemed to confirm one thing – there is nothing else you need.  We were all Christians who loved God, but until that moment we were consumed with the cares of life.  What we felt as we walked along the beach were the concerns of a temporary existence, but in that place of fellowship we were experiencing something far greater – something eternal.

A couple thousand years before a group of men not unlike us had a similar experience as they sat on a fishing boat all night at sea.  The Lord had risen from the dead and appeared to them, but since that moment everything was back to life as usual.  There was nothing more exciting than to be with JESUS – everyday was an adventure that would unfold with miraculous events.  But now that He was gone all the old concerns came rushing back in – make money, find a wife, raise a family.  Peter was already a married man with a fishing business when JESUS came into his life, and he left the business to follow Him as a disciple.  Now back on his old fishing boat like nothing ever happened, he couldn’t help but feel empty inside when they couldn’t catch anything.  All of this changed in an instant when they heard a voice from the shoreline yelling, “Children, do you have any meat?”

It didn’t take long to figure out it was the Lord when after obeying His voice to cast their nets on the other side of the boat they immediately swelled with fish.  Jumping overboard into the frigid water, Peter swam to the shoreline where he saw a fire of coals burning with fish and bread.  At that moment, the fish he previously worked so hard to find no longer meant anything to Peter – all that mattered was being with the Lord.  The disciples pulled the net loaded with fish to the shore where fish were already baking, and JESUS asked Peter, “Simon, son of Jonas, do you love me more than these?”  Fish or the Lord, the answer was easy for Peter, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.”  Three times Jesus asked Peter that same question, and He responded the same way after Peter’s response, “Feed my sheep.”

When my brothers and I sat down at that fire on the beach, like the disciples concerns over fish, our concerns over relationships seemed silly in the presence of the LORD.  God prepared us a place on the beach just as He had prepared a place for the disciples on a similar beach long ago, and what were relationships to God?  When JESUS provided all those fish in an instant for the disciples, He made it very clear that it was no problem for Him to provide.  But beyond His ability to provide relationships, did we value relationships more than Him?  On that beach in Santa Cruz, there were many couples walking along the beach – but every single one of those relationships would one day end.  In the presence of the LORD in our fellowship by the fire, we had a beautiful relationship in JESUS that would never end.

Super Pinch Pot

My ceramics teacher sighed as she passed my workstation as I held a contorted wet lump of reddish clay in my hands.  She might have been more understanding if I hadn’t been working on it for days.  It was supposed to be the first project of the year, a coil pinch pot – the simplest method for making primitive style pottery.  Early in the process I rolled the earthen clay into long cylindrical strips and began coiling them together into a miniature bowl shape, but I didn’t want to make a bowl!  In a room near the kiln where other student projects were fired I saw hundreds of fingerprint laden ‘bowls’ that looked haphazardly mashed together.  It saddened me to think that my contribution would be more of the same, so I resolved at that moment to make a really cool pinch pot.

Instead of making a bowl, I decided to make a vase with a flared neck – just for a little extra style.  Of course this was the first time I had ever worked with clay, and the only technique I knew was the ‘pinch and coil’ method.  It seemed that the next logical step in the process was to make more clay strips and build a dome over my bowl, and so I began pinching, coiling, and smoothing the clay.  For days this went on, until finally my piece started looking like a little globe with a hole on top!  By this time everyone in the class was now working on their second, or third projects, but my teacher’s smiles as she walked by encouraged me to continue on my ‘super pinch pot’ project.  I began building the neck when to my sorrow the entire structure began to sag at the base like a full garbage bag.

“Nooo! All of that work for nothing!” I thought, and briefly considered firing it and just moving on to the next project.  But the idea of seeing my sagging pinch pot on the shelf as an immortalized tribute to my frustrated efforts was too much to bear.  The next step was going to be difficult – and embarrassing, because everyone in the class was now ahead of me and I was under the glaring scrutiny of my teacher.  In order to solve the problem I needed to widen the hole in the dome and fortify the foundation from the inside!  To everyone else my great ambitious project was going to look like an utter mess, like a total failure.  Only I would know that the ugly wet lump in front of me was better off now than it was before.

Coming to Christ, and growing in Christ, is a lot like my super pinch pot.  In the world or even in our current relationship with Jesus there is a certain level of ‘goodness’ we can attain to ourselves.  From the perspective of others our lives can look attractive and smooth on the outside, but on the inside we can barely hold ourselves up.  Coming to Jesus, and growing to a new place in Him often requires some serious internal work, where our inner foundation is fortified in Christ.  That is a messy business, because it requires facing your issues instead of ignoring them, and acknowledging your need for JESUS.  In a world where outer appearances are more important than souls, some of us will choose to look good instead of being reworked on the inside.

Paul wrote to the Romans, “Behold, I lay in Zion a stumblingstone and rock of offense: and whosoever believes on him shall not be ashamed”. –Romans 9:33  JESUS is a stumblingstone and a rock of offense because we must be broken down in order to receive Him.  To others you look more messed up after coming to JESUS than you were before, but those who receive Him know the work He is doing on the inside.  As cool as my super pinch pot, or, flared vase ended up being, God’s plans for every individual are far greater.  When you really believe that God has the best of intentions for you, it is much easier to yield to Him.  He promises, “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.” –Jeremiah 29:11